My first experience with the Spirit Lake Tribe came at the behest of their previous chief judge. The matter at hand was a case involving a murdered child. “I trust your judgment,” she said. “I need fresh eyes.” As I read through the materials she faxed, a heavy stone of grief formed in the pit of my stomach. I felt as though I should cough it up, but it would get caught in my throat so I swallowed it down and focused harder. While I’ve never fully adjusted to seeing tragedy and putting the pieces of shattered lives back together, I would learn how to let it pass through me and use what little resources I had to do the best I could for those who came before me.

The tribal council declared a State of Emergency due to the drug epidemic last year, and as chief judge I was on the frontlines. I was part of a team that conducted numerous drug busts and banished and excluded those who were found guilty of selling and manufacturing drugs like meth and heroin. Things got a little scary. I received a number of death threats. One was credible enough to merit law enforcement protection and federal intervention. I’ve been followed too. Last month, someone tried to break into my house.

During my 16-month tenure I saw many things. Grandmothers with black eyes and broken noses, young women reduced to skin and bones by meth who couldn’t stop grinding their teeth and picking at their skin in the courtroom, and crying mothers begging their children to stop trying to kill themselves. I also bore witness to the quiet strength and resilience of the majority- good, hardworking tribal citizens fighting for the survival of their people. Young fathers pushing their babies in strollers on a cloudy Sunday morning, industrious teenagers selling pancakes for school trips, elders teaching Dakota language, and a tenacious group of Rez boys who won the North Dakota State B Boys Basketball Championship. All of these fine individuals are the heart of our Nation, and the key to saving tribal communities. While some grandstand and devote themselves to tearing the people apart, the good and decent among us are busy doing the hard work of mending the sacred hoop.