My fellow Natives and I, quaffing fine whiskey and dining on bacon-wrapped dates at one of New York City's only Native-owned lounges, pondered the potential accusations of this nation's bigots and birthers (were a Native to audaciously run for the American presidency): "Indians are Americans, yes, but they're also citizens – not members – of quasi separate-sovereign nations," they'll say. "They hold their own elections, and not like a city voting for a mayor, but a nation electing their own president." "Dates! Dates!" a voice bellowed. "We need more dates!" It was at this moment as he, the maniacal epicurean, demanded more finger food that I felt I'd jump in with some awful news: "There’s only one enrolled Native American at Congress,” I said. "And it’s not Elizabeth Warren. No, sir. She opted to return to her European roots and registered as white.” "Well, who the hell is it then?" said the man who demanded so many more dates and a fresh round of cheeses and fruit.Get the Story:
Oliver B. Barker: JFK, a Native President of the U.S. and Bacon-Wrapped Dates (Indian Country Today 12/25)
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